Booknote: Spending the Holidays With People I Want to Punch in the Throat

Jen Mann, Spending the Holidays with People I Want to Punch in the Throat: Yuletide Yahoos, Ho-Ho Humblebraggers, and Other Seasonal Scourges. New York: Random House, 2015. ISBN: 9781101922903

Genre: humor
Subgenre: memoir, holidays
Format: electronic audiobook
Source: Overdrive system via the Madison County (KY) Public Library

I am not sure why I picked up this book since I did not really like her other book. At the time, I was just looking for an easy audiobook read on Overdrive, so I took a chance. This was not a good idea. The humor is not really that good, and at times it is cringe inducing. Let me jot down some highlights to help readers decide if they want to read this or not.

At the beginning, the author emphasizes these are her stories and this is how she remembered things. If you remember things differently, well, go write your own book. She usually uses that line in her books (you can also find in her other book which I have reviewed. See link above). As for the holidays, she states that she may find something she likes about the holidays. However, that  is not this book. It may be her next book. However, I probably will not find out if that is the case since I have no intention to pick up any other of her books if she writes any new ones. Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice, shame on me. I am not giving her another chance.

Part of the book presents a list of things she hates about the holidays:

• One thing I do wonder about: when the fuck did the Easter Bunny start bringing presents? It must be a recent shit because I sure as hell never saw it growing up nor anyone I knew did it.
• Pumpkin flavored anything. To be honest, this gripe feels like a pretty easy thing to hate, low hanging fruit. Just about every grumpy holiday list has this.
• Drunken dads taking the kids out for Trick or Treat pulling a wagon of beer behind them. This is a thing? I must have lived in a less drunken neighborhood. 
• She hates hopping for the gifts. She falls in the buy them a gift card and  get it over with, preferably Amazon or Target gift card. Her family may not like it or think it fun, but hey, give  her a gift card anytime. Me? I am happy to take the gift card, or better yet, the cash. 
•  The events. This may be a case of overbooking, or I am just not social enough. She says she is booked right at Halloween and all through the season, but by Valentine's Day, no one wants to see her again til next Halloween. As I said, I do not have this problem, and this seems more like a First World Problem to me, but then again, I am not the most social person. Additionally, I  have learned to value quiet, peace, and privacy over spending holidays with people I can barely stand.
•  The food. This I mainly have a love/hate relationship. Small things like pumpkin pie I like, but for the  most part, I do not give a shit about the Thanksgiving menu. In fact, in our house we go out of our way to make anything not "traditional." One year we made lasagna and Italian fare, next it was Puerto Rican food, year after that tacos and Mexican. Honestly, why Americans insist in their bland, tasteless fare is beyond me.

Moving  along, the Neon Virgin Chapter just devolved into a teen angst drama performance. It is cringe-worthy, and you probably are better off skipping it. By the way, do not steal your parents' credit card no matter how cool you think it will be to spend money you do not have without the "parental units" knowing. Obviously these kids were not raised right. But this was before electronics for credit cards, so took a good while for parents to get a bill on a credit card via snail mail.

Overall, much  of the book boils down to old, crappy stories of the author's teen years worrying more about being cool and fussing, often ungrateful like many teens tend to do. The fact she often reads this with a whiny teen-like voice does not exactly help the narrative, and it turns out to be more annoying than amusing. Like her other book, how the hell a publisher approved this is beyond me. Funny is not an adjective I would use to describe this author nor her material.

Bottom line: 1 out of 5 stars, barely. It is as bad if not worse than her other books. Why I picked this up beyond me.