"[Sen. Dan] Patrick [R-Houston] believes tuition at four-year universities is too high, budgets are too big and said they have lost sight of the main mission to teach and prepare students for a career."
Translation: College is too dadburn expensive. We doesn't be hankerin' t'pay fo' it even (even though we desperately need ejoocayted varmints in this hyar state). Them dadburn college professo's is paid too much t'do too li'l, spendin' time doin' research, whutevah thet means. Oh, we doesn't need kids studyin' hoominities o' literature o' ennythin' fluffy.
Perry goes on to say:
"It is a goal Perry said could be reached with online courses and 'innovative teaching techniques.'"
Translation: Agin, we does not be hankerin' t'pay fo' classrooms on account o' kids kin jest hoof it to class in their pajamas fum their house. Professo's kin be hired on th' cheap, probably temps, an' they kin larn hundreds an' hundreds of kids online instead of in a classroom, dawgone it.
By the way, notice that "innovative teaching techniques" are never defined. I am betting that in Gov. Goodhair's La-la land it probably means something online, with some bells and whistles (not too many, he wants to be cheap). How this would work is not defined either, but apparently he does not realize that creating and running online classes do have costs as well.
So basically it seems his solution is to, eventually, just close down those fancy colleges. Keep some people and buildings somewhere with computers so they can teach all the classes online. And this does not even consider cost of textbooks (another cost I am sure the governor has not considered). Send the rest to community colleges (nothing wrong with CC's, but if you want something more than just a vocational or training certificate, like a full degree, you need a four year school). Because in the end, heaven forbid people invest in their future by making sure they have a well educated workforce and society. And I mean educated to do more than work as waitresses, fast food workers, and day laborers. Yes, you do have to hold those who voted for those politicians accountable as well, who whine "I don't want my taxes to go up" but love to benefit from public services and brag how their kid went to one of the fine universities in Texas, which won't remain fine for long if plans like these come to fruition.
Note: translations done via the Dialectizer and with some close reading of what the politicians actually say.